HOW TO DEAL WITH THE RESISTANCE FOR STUDIES OF YOUR CHILD?
It’s a common thing that every parent has to struggle for their children to finish their homework, studies for the upcoming exams and to practice repeatedly not to forget those what has been taught before. Most of the time, this may be met at the cost of scolding, beating and forcing them to sit and finish the tasks. As a remedial measure, you may end up the resistance with a punishment, which should be avoided.
Resistance for studies at different levels or age groups carries different reasons and to be dealt in different ways. You may have to adopt a unique technique for your 5 years kid which may not work for your 15 year child. Let’s take some examples:
There might be times when your five years kid is not interested in study at all.
Mom: Finish your homework by writing the spelling of 1–40.
Kid: But Mom, 1 to 40 is too much.
Mom: It’s not too much for you. You have to do it.
Kid: I can’t do it.
Mom: If you don’t do it, then you will not be allowed to watch cartoons today.
Kid: Let me watch my favourite cartoon first and then I’ll finish my homework.
Mom: No, you have to finish your homework first, else you will be punished.
Kid: But my cartoon show???
Mom: You are making so many excuses. Finish it right now, otherwise I’m going to throw your books away.
Kid: But Mom, it’s too much. I’m not able to do it.
Up to this point, it’s very common to almost all parents. But managing the situation in a positive direction is not easy for all.
Few parents leave the situation as they are busy with other personal, professional or household activities and let the children decide what they want to do.
Few parents like to arrange an external tutor for their children as they can’t deal with the situation.
Few are rigid with their target and make the children to finish the tasks by virtue of punishment.
Few parents deal with the situation by diverting their minds or applying some playful tricks.
What is the ideal method to deal with the situation?
You need to understand your child first. What she wants, what she likes, what is the current mind-set etc. Suppose she is in a mood to play at that time and you have assigned her the task. She is in a hurry and that’s the reason why she feels it overburdened. She wants to write the spelling from one to twenty as it will take half of the time.
So in this situation, what can be done?
First: Let her enjoy her own assignments.
Second: Accommodate her in a playful trick. You can tell her to write how much she wants or is comfortable with. Let’s assume she is comfortable till twenty. Tell her that she has done an excellent job and praise her for her activities. It may inspire her to write down another twenties.
Third: Just tell her how much time she has taken for writing her first twenties and it’s very fast. She can finish another twenty with very less time. Her fast writing may inspire her for another span of fast writing.
Fourth: Reward. Get them rewarded for their successful completion of the homework or any other assignments given. It may be a chocolate or milkshake or watch time of their favourite cartoon show.
Fifth: A funny Play. Countdown. Let her know that she has only twenty numbers remaining to be written and the number count will reduce for writing each single number. Remember that, each successful reduction in the number count is an achievement for the child and every individual gets pleasure and rewarded on his/her achievements. So is with your children. It will inspire them to be involved more with your ultimate assignment with pleasure.
But…. It’s not going to work for a 15 year child. He may feel that you are making him fool by implementing these tricks. Because, at this age they may be intelligent enough to understand the tricks and may not have a vision. And that’s the high time to build their dreams and set their goals. The dreams and goals will drive them in an ultimate way.
If one has the dream to design her career as a pilot, she has to know the basic academic qualification, physical health standards like height, weight & stamina and intellectual standard etc. once the dream has been shaped, it will be easier for one to set the goal with time line and measurement. Like how much to be studied, how much exercise to be done, what should be the sleeping time, how much time to be spent on TV, social media, movies and entertainment?
Once a fire is connected with them, no parents have to watch them or push them for studies. Rather, they will make their own path and manage their time and activities accordingly.
Here I want to remind you again, that the plan and policy for raising a child and nurturing is not the same in each stage of life. Resistance for studies can be handled very smoothly and in various funny ways. If you have any queries regarding this, you can be connected with us at our telegram group.